You’ve heard of FOMO? The fear of missing out. Well, I never experienced this.
Instead I feel JOMO – the joy of missing out!
I always felt a little bit bad about my JOMO, almost to the extent that I had FOMO of FOMO! I never really understood why I didn’t mind missing out on things – birthdays, work drinks, dinner parties, x-mas parties, even coffee with friends. If I didn’t go, I didn’t mind.
Then, only recently, I made what I feel is an important realisation about myself.
I have come to understand that I am introverted.
This has been of some surprise to me. I don’t know how my friends and family feel about my realisation – maybe they knew all along what it has taken me 29 years to see! I just never thought of myself as an introvert.
I guess I though that introverts are shy people who don’t know how to socialise. I never really thought about the possibility that introverts may just prefer not to socialise. I also never considered the fact that there might be a spectrum of introversion rather than a black and white categorisation.
For a long time I assumed I was an extrovert.
I can socialise and I can small talk and I can avoid awkward conversations and I am great at customer service and I can tell a good story and I often keep people laughing and I never feel shy and rarely feel nervous. But I feel anxious about big crowds and I feel tired at the though of parties and I can think of so many things I would rather do than go for drinks with colleagues after a long workday. Not because I don’t like my colleagues but because after a day of talking at work, I want quiet time.
I need quiet time.
I need time to myself and time without chatter and time to “refresh” my mind. I may not be an extreme introvert but now that I know that I have introvert tendencies I can better cater to my own needs. This is a really important realisation for my mental health and means I no longer have to be even silently apologetic about my JOMO!
Are you more of an introvert or an extrovert and what impact does this have on your life?